January Update

How it has been going:

T-Guy said to me This is the most fun we've had homeschooling in a long time.  J-Baby was fussing  over writing letters on the second day.  I started stressing out when we didn't have time for focused work on Friday.

It makes sense to me.  T-Guy thrives on structure, on knowing what comes next each hour of each day.  J-Baby wants to do things his way, in his own time.  I waver between the two, but when I make plans I want them followed.

What if, I ask Papa, what if we just think about where we want to go and help the boys get there?  What if I stop worrying that blocks need to be 3 - 4 weeks in duration?  What if I just use holistic education models when the boys want to learn something, on their timetable?

I recognized a strong need for rhythm.  Why does that have to be realized as a homeschooling schedule?  What if we bring in other ways to mark our days, weeks, and months?

In the wee hours of the morning I decided that I need to make myself more fully present in my home.  I'm taking a message board break, unsubscribing from some email lists, and cutting the number of blogs I read to those that truly inspire me.  I made a little label for my laptop that asks Is this really what I want to be doing?

When my boys were little I didn't use the computer unless they were sleeping.  Now, I think this would be an unrealistic goal at this point, as the computer is a tool for many household tasks and offers a wealth of information that the boys and I can share.  But I can cut back on using the computer as a way to connect to other people, the people I don't really know.  I probably know more about one mamas recent family crisis than I do about the book T-Guy just read, and that isn't what I want at all.

I'm not making rules.  I'm not abandoning the plan I just made.  It's a nice roadmap, and we may find it handy now and then.  I'm just going to inhabit the space between the perfectly detailed plan and what feels like a lack of rhythm, and see what I can find.  How would I spend this day if it was the last day I had with my children?  What is my vision of our lives, and am I living in a way that is consistent with that vision?